Lots of screaming(at me)
Lots of stress(whole family)
Lots of crap(“pets”)
Bad sleep(me)
Bad form(“pets”)
I don’t want to elaborate or revisit this crap weekend. If you know me, you’ll understand.
Bad week. I’m really in a position where I want to scream and hang out with friends.
Edit: What sucks more is that I wasn’t able to get my comics tonight. So the reviews will come a bit late tomorrow. Nyuf!
What gets my creativity up? A CHALLENGE.
I was talking about a LOMO addicted friend in a previous post and I gotta admit, it kinda gets my hackles up when someone sees a lomographer like him and dismisses LOMO as a random art form and “art from crap”. Though I’m not saying it ISN’T. I also admit that I use a very non-LOMO LSI camera.
The HOLGA is a beautiful medium format that many old school photographers hold in high regard. Ken Rockwell even going as far as calling it “the secret behind many of the world’s greatest photos” while at the same time warning that “beware the Holga. It’s a toy plastic camera loved by artists for its fuzzy images and light leaks. It’s not the camera to get for sharp images”.
I guess it’s time to tame the savage beast once again. I want to have a small exhibit of photos, maybe 12-16 shots all taken on Holgas. It’s going to have vignettes, fisheyes, multiple exposures and cross-processing. EVERY trick and option under the sun. BUT it will all be done WELL. By well I mean that the shots will still be composed, will still be planned, will still be a GREAT photograph.
Does anyone want to help me? Do you have any suggestions? Do you want to join my crusade?
It stops being LOMOcrappy once you start taking photographs.
Still in the middle of resigning from my “job”.
So yeah, I’m still editing the stuff up on WORD.
Stupid “100 song” meme taking up my time.
They will come. Sorry for the delay and have patience. I got real shit to do.
By the way, I may have found a Marvel series to actually follow and collect FOR ONCE.
And no, I haven’t gotten it. I haven’t been getting the impetus to go beyond my normal “less than 500 word” blog entries. It’s frustrating that there are so many things in my head but I find it so hard to let them out in a coherent manner like writing.
Right now my brain is a mash of flying ideas and random emotions. It’s a very uncomfortable time right now when I’m uncomfortable even around people who I’ve known for AT LEAST 7 years. I’m tired alot so I’m probably in a low point/valley of my “bi-polar-ness”. I don’t really understand why I’m feeling like this or what triggered it. I guess the family situation has finally gotten to me.
I’ve also found a sort of comfortable niche in my photography. I’ve always wanted to take photos of people and I really like the energy of music so I’ve been looking forward to gigs and concerts to take photos of. I’m not that good at it yet as my framing and certain issues have been popping up BUT I’m getting somewhere.
If you’re a photographer and you want to get better, go over to www.kenrockwell.com and read up. REALLY read up. He makes sense. Admittedly, I don’t agree with some of his points BUT he knows his shit. Don’t be caught up in your preconceptions, READ. Then go and make your own way. That’s what I did.
Okay, here’s something I’ve been thinking of doing with friends. A photo-safari somewhere, ANYWHERE. I don’t really care anymore. I want to have fun with friends and photography again. I may actually pop out the film camera and some of the treasured VELVIA 50s I’ve been keeping in stock for this safari. Which reminds me, it’s time to go buy some film. I hear fuji megamall just got some new stock.
I’m glad that the LSI camera I started on, a HOLGA 120CFN, was one of the “serious” Lomographic cameras. This is entirely my opinion but you can’t go around expecting the camera to do all the work for you. The artsy side of Lomo(which is what alot of people don’t REALLY get) is that you create the image in your mind’s eye, you don’t just go snapping up every single thing you see praying to get something good. That sometimes works, admittedly, but put in a bit of effort man! You have to set up the multiple exposures to actually make them MEAN SOMETHING. This is the same reason why some people with digital cameras infuriate me. They keep shooting, hoping for a good shot that they can post. Why don’t they MAKE a good shot so they can post it?
Now, let me tell you about my newest sourceS, PLURAL, of camera lust.
I’ve been wanting for an OLYMPUS 35RC for a long time now, and now that I have the money to get one, I can’t find one conveniently available. Can anyone help me? PLEASE!
I’ve also found a Nikon FG camera with a 50mm f/1.8 that’s very reasonably priced. Great find, but now I have to get more funds. This is a situation I normally have a hard time handling. Hehe.
So there, I finally have the long entry I was looking for with the needed RANTAGE and RAVE-AGE to get my emotions out. Yay for me!
An exercise gone weird
Thankful for
I’m really glad I’ve got my friends. It makes me happy to know I’ve got REAL friend who’ve got my back. This week, I’ve realized how important they are to me. They’re probably the only reason OTHER than my family that I’m still alive now. I believe that I’ve gained more friends in the past two years than I have in the previous 20. I honestly can’t say that I’m an easy person to get along with. I’m difficult to understand at my best and impossible to decipher or tolerate at my worst. I admit that, the proof is in the pudding.
These friends of mine TRY to understand me. THAT is ALL I need. I know it sounds simple but I’m a shallow sonuvabitch. I’m SO shallow that I’ve gained more friends in the past two years than I can fit on my outer extremities, so yeah, MORE THAN TWENTY. Seeing as that I’ve never gotten that many in such a short time, I think this is something that I can be proud of.
Neither am I the easiest person to look up to. I’m not altruistic, almost downright greedy at times. I’m not in any way compassionate. I’m not “nice” in the simplest sense of the word. I’m abrasive, crass, downright crude at times and I wouldn’t shirk at throwing a curveball at you for my own amusement. I love my friends because they really see past that. I admit that I tend to show them flashes of another me, a me that most people think is a nice guy.
Who do I regard as friends? I’ve got lists. There are the Shak/Fortress bois, some Rushers, some radio personalities I’ve gotten close to and some photographers/lawyers/doctors/etc… I’ve met along the way.
The Shak/Fortress bois are the people who I truly feel part of, a merry band of guys who get into adventures and misadventures on a weekly basis. I admit that we’re a much looser coalition than you would think but I’m MORE than proud to call myself a part of this group. Our geeky discussions are lively, and would best be described as “intelligent conversations about the dumbest things”. I mean, who else would discuss their palns for the ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE(you don’t believe me, then I’ll leave you behind) or who among their friends they would eat first. NO, this isn’t some facebook quiz boyos, these are the discussion we get into when we’re NOT drunk. These are the guys I also learn the most from, it’s no surprise seeing as that these guys are all engineers, doctors, lawyers. Oh, and did I mention the teasing? DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT say, do, or even ALLUDE to anything that may have the slightest possible chance to embarrass you. I am not kidding, we will pick it up and you will regret it for the rest of your life, or the next few months at least.
Rushers are a diverse group of people but deep in our core we’re all the same. Some are younger than me, some are older than me. Some are straight, some are gay, some I don’t know, some I don’t care. All I really care about when you tell me you’re a rusher is that you listen to and love the Morning Rush. No bones about it, that’s it. Sure there are some rushers I don’t really like, but yeah, the rushers as a group are REALLY cohesive. It’s actually kind of scary at times, especially for someone who kind of shuns human contact at times but I think I may have scared them as well. Silly me.
Radio personalities, where do I begin? These are the people I listen to to and who keep me sane throughout the week. I know I can vent to them and I’ll get a balanced view instead of a jackass answer or an answer that’s based on what I WANT to hear. These people have my respect(all of them) and my admiration(some of them). I may not agree with how some show that they care about you or are cool with you but it’s all good.